I'm 42 this year, and if I had the chance to go back ten years and talk to my 32-year-old self, I've thought about what I would say to make him less anxious, maybe even happy.
I've come up with a few things, and I'd like to share them with everyone. First, get away from those jobs that keep you up all night and make your hair fall out as soon as possible. Burning the candle at both ends isn’t what you should be doing right now.
Second, don’t kid yourself. It’s not that you’re failing, but often it’s the industry that’s gone down the drain. Don’t wait around, thinking, "Oh, maybe the job market will bounce back one day." Get out as fast as you can, don’t even waste time talking about it, because if the sky falls, it’s going to take you down with it.
Also, don’t waste time and money trying to manage relationships. There isn’t a single relationship worth draining your energy over. Fifth, just have enough money to get by. As long as you’re not trying to run a business, you won’t go broke.
Sixth, don’t force yourself to grow up. Keeping a childlike heart is the key to your happiness. Seventh, don’t believe that hard work alone will lead to success. Successful people either have connections backing them or capital in their hands. This society has long been rigged, and you’re not getting to the top.
Eighth, skip those ridiculous, competitive school reunions. It might seem like you all started at the same point, but in reality, your goals are different, and so are your standards. Don’t get impressed by those who’ve made money recently; they were worse off than you when they started. If you could really go back, staying single and childless would be the way to go. Completely laying low and avoiding consumerism is the true path to enlightenment. Even everyday stuff like smokes, alcohol, sweets, and tea aren’t necessities, let alone cars and houses. Think about it—aren’t fewer and fewer people around you spending at high-end places?
My classmates who graduated around the same time as me now spend less money daily than they did during uni. People have started shifting their focus from materialism to mental and spiritual wellbeing. Frankly, earning just enough to cover basic needs and keeping your mouth shut is the way to go. Eat well, drink well, and stay up late if you want. Here’s what I’ve realised: when those of us who’ve been slogging away decide we’re done playing the game, the so-called successful and wealthy folks will start to panic. Even then, they’ll still believe their success and wealth are the results of their own hard work, but in reality, their wealth was built by us—the ones who’ve been grinding away like idiots, only to let them enjoy the spoils.
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